19th Birthday Post - My Favourite Films About Growing Up That I Watched While Growing Up

This is a really dark birthday candle picture but I think it's pretty and there's no 19th birthday photos anyway

Hi, I know, two posts in one week...damn the world must be headed for an apocalypse or something. Rather, it is my 19th birthday tomorrow. Which is interesting because I feel absolutely no excitement for this new age because it doesn't really mean anything. It is like being 17 - that awkward gap between sweet 16 and the big 18. So when it came time for me to think about doing a birthday post, I really didn't have anything to draw on because there's no such thing as R19 movies here (although there probably would be, considering that New Zealand's rating system is just ridiculous) and I've already "grown up" since I have to pay full adult price for everything now.

Seriously, it sucks having to draw my attention away from the kids menu at restaurants because I'm an adult so I have to get steak.

In my thinking, though, I came to the realisation that even though 19 isn't a particularly special milestone age, this is the first birthday in my "new life", you could say. Gone are the days of growing up in a small town, since now I've lived in Christchurch for over six months and passed my first semester of university. I no longer have to go grocery shopping with mum but I can buy chocolate whenever I want which is honestly the best part of growing up. Oh, and did I mention that I have a cinema five minutes bus ride away, with three others within a half an hour radius? If that's not cool, then I don't know what is.

In a way, 19 is a pretty important age to be. Whereas 18 is the age where you get slapped with the label "grown up", whether you're ready or not, by the time you're 19 you've done a spectacular amount of growing up. Well, I guess that's just how I feel now since a lot has changed since I turned 18 (I say this every year, but I could probably say now that just about every aspect of my life is so different from what it was last year). In celebration of that fact, here's a whole lot of films that taught me a bit about growing up while I was growing up. Don't expect John Hughes films (don't get me wrong, they had their influence), but more a bunch of films that came out at vital times in my life and gave me a bit of perspective. And yeah, things get mushy.

An Education - Earlier this year I outlined my intense love for this film, mainly because it shows the struggles of living up to unreasonable expectations in every way possible. I've always found myself to be a little bit of a Jenny, trying my best to do things that I don't really care for, working hard but hoping that there'll be a little bit of fun around the corner, and maybe being a little too 'pretentious' for my age (now I'm grown up and living with a whole lot of engineers, I'm just known as the weird Arts degree student). Just as the title suggests, it has always been a film that I go back to get an education, whether it be about getting a "real" education or an education from "the university of life".

2013 was the Year of...

2013 was a pretty big year. Perhaps not in my film watching (which will be shown in my unofficial Top 15 that'll be posted up tomorrow morning), but there were plenty of things that I loved about this crazy year. So here's a big gigantic mess of the things that made 2013 what it was for me, some of which are movie related, most of which is culture related, and just the general happenings of 2013 that will remain landmarks for the year. Kinda like flipping through the back pages of my diary. But more interesting than my diary would be if I actually had time to keep one.

The Actors 

Daniel Day-Lewis
Yup, this was definitely my biggest actor obsession of the year. Spurred off by my drama class doing The Crucible, and then turning into this big thing where all I'd do with my spare time is watch his Oscar acceptance speeches over and over (I haven't watched one in about three weeks - have I been rehabilitated?). All other spare time was taken up by watching all of his movies. Which brought me to the lovely My Beautiful Laundrette, the awe-inspiring My Left Foot, the rather restrained The Age of Innocence, the amazing In the Name of the Father, of course The Crucible, the gutsy The Boxer, the violent Gangs of New York, the heartbreaking The Ballad of Jack and Rose, a rewatch of There Will Be Blood which boosted my love for the film, a rewatch of Nine which dragged down my supposed love for that film, and a couple of watches of Lincoln which just exemplifies how Daniel has mastered his craft. I wish I had at least 40% of his commitment.

Bradley Cooper
This has been a banner year for Bradley Cooper, an actor who I've long been in love with since The Hangover back in 2009. Along comes Silver Linings Playbook, which shows what I've long known: Bradley Cooper is one talented actor who is more than just the "eye candy" status that the woman's magazines like to lay on him. The Place Beyond the Pines gave him another chance to show how talented he is, and I hear that he's one of the best things about American Hustle. Hopefully The Hangover has been long left behind, and it is only up from here.

How I Created My Top 100 Favourite Films

Making "the list" is a hard job. It really is. How in the world out of over 1000 films, is one supposed to pick their 100 favourites?

Truth is, you can't. And even though I'm mostly happy with my Top 100, there are still movies which I wish were in there. Movies that should've been slightly higher in the list. So of course, it isn't a definitive list for me, but it makes me happy. If you were ever wondering about how I make these Top 100 lists, here are the things I take into consideration:

1) The Favourite Film vs. Best Film Ever argument

It is so hard to define what the "Best Film Ever" is. I think it is all based on the superficiality: how good the script is, how good the editing is, how good the cinematography is, all of that stuff. But what's the point in me making a "Best Film Ever" list? I think that's only worthy if you've seen every single film under the sun. Favourite Films are a different story. The thing that keeps film alive is that we all connect to these different films in different ways, and the experiences can be unique to us. Which leads me to my next point...

Breaking Tears and Surprise

Mettel Ray is hosting another blogathon before the festive season, and this time it is called 'Breaking Emotion' (which reminds me, I really need to get on my bike and continue watching Breaking Bad). Unfortunately, I missed the first instalment - all about fear and awkwardity in movies - since I was too busy breaking all of my real emotions with the end of my high schooling. Alas, this week's emotions are tears and surprise, two emotions which I'm all too familiar with in films. Here's what Mettel has to say about them on her blog.

First up, three films (only three films...hmmm) that make me cry tears of sadness. The sad fact is that I can no longer go to the cinemas because I cry at every movie I see. I was an absolute wreck after Gravity two times over, which was rather embarrassing for the people who went through that movie with me. Alas, I do enjoy crying in movies, so here's the three that devastated me the most:

Super Late 2012 Retrospective: My Top 20 of 2012

So, I can finally put 2012 out of my mind now that I've made this extra long list. I won't deliberate much longer, but I will say that this'll be the last time you'll hear from me for a while...I'm still extremely busy! Until then, don't forget about me, and be thankful I managed to do this list before 2013 was over too. Ha. (by the way, top of 2013 so far is Before Midnight, followed by The Great Gatsby, The Place Beyond the Pines, Side Effects and Spring Breakers. Let's see how they stand this time next year)

Honourable mentions: The Intouchables, The Impossible, Life of Pi, The Raid: Redemption, Compliance, Les Miserables, Lincoln, Skyfall, Flight, Vamps, Cloud Atlas, Dredd, Bachelorette, Pitch Perfect, Safety Not Guaranteed, The Avengers, The Cabin in the Woods, The Grey, Chronicle.

20. Celeste & Jesse Forever (Dir. Lee Toland Krieger)
I don't know why, but I find Rashida Jones absolutely fascinating. She seems like the kind of girl who anyone could get along with, since she's so smart, funny, and endlessly charming. So when I heard that a film that she wrote herself was going to make it to the big screen, I was pretty darn excited. And guess what three words describe the outcome? Smart, funny and charming. It may not turn around the rom-com genre as some were hoping (and come on, we should stop wishing for this to happen, two people will end up being together or they won't), but it gave it a damn good try.

19. Anna Karenina (Dir. Joe Wright)
Maybe I just kinda romanticise this movie a little bit because it was the last movie I watched before Stage Challenge happened (I have a habit of romanticising this time of my life and I don't know why), and maybe it lost its shine when I had to study it for an English assessment, but there's one thing that I absolutely love about Anna Karenina that earns it its spot here: Joe Wright's ambitious direction. The fact that this film moves along like a musical even if there's no real singing, the way that big theatre is set up, the way that everything looks...it is decadent and glorious to watch. Plus, I'd like to see Alicia Vikander get more roles. Her and Jessica Chastain are pretty much going to tear down Hollywood within the next few years.

18. The Master (Dir. Paul Thomas Anderson)
I understood most of it. I'd have to watch it again in the very distant future for it to have an effect on me, but I appreciated what Paul Thomas Anderson was trying to do. This film feels like it exists on a different planet, so far away from any of the other films of 2012. It is fearless, disconcerting and so complex. Along with that, you have Joaquin Phoenix, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Amy Adams honing in some of the best performances of their careers - that's a term that's thrown around lightly, but considering their almost perfect filmographies, that's a considerable achievement.

17. Your Sister's Sister (Dir. Lynn Shelton)
The way this film ticks over, without any real hurry, just at a natural pace, is what I loved most about Your Sister's Sister. It was just a really nice movie, where people weren't going out of their way to make any drama, it just happened. I admire filmmakers who can make their movies without feeling like they have to place all the action on a highwire, instead letting everything fall into place. Your Sister's Sister is a stunning example of that.

16. The Most Fun You Can Have Dying (Dir. Kristin Marcon)
I'm actually rather surprised that a NZ film made it onto my list this year, but ever since I saw The Most Fun You Can Have Dying over a year ago, I haven't been able to shake it. It isn't perfect, but it is made beautifully, without the usual essence of NZ filmmakers trying way too hard to be schizophrenically strange (An Angel at My Table and Heavenly Creatures are the guilty parties and it would seem that most NZ filmmakers have tried to follow in their footsteps). The Most Fun You Can Have Dying is mature, gorgeously shot and features a wonderful performance by Matt Whelan. Hopefully it makes it to some international markets, because this is finally a film that NZ can be proud of.

15. Coriolanus (Dir. Ralph Fiennes)
I studied this one for my English project as well, and I was surprised at how good of an adaptation this one is, and how underrated it is. Ralph Fiennes' top directorial debut seemed to come and go without much notice, even though it brought a severely underrated Shakespeare tale to life with some shocking relevance to the world we live in 400 years on. It's a little bit like The Hurt Locker with Shakespearean language. Plus, extra points for slipping a luminous Jessica Chastain in their to be my favourite actor's wife. Worth the price of the ticket for that alone (at least for me, anyway).

14. Smashed (Dir. James Ponsoldt)
For a film about addiction, this film is rather level-headed. There's no big teary monologues, no over-reaching for drama, no-one treating their addiction as if it had the same levity as an impending apocalypse. Instead, it feels like a page was ripped out of the diary of someone who actually experienced alcoholism, and what they did to try and prevent it from taking over their life. Part of the way helped by a towering performance from Mary Elizabeth Winstead and apt support from Aaron Paul and Octavia Spencer, Smashed takes the melodrama out and replaces it with naturalism, which is just about the most disconcerting thing you can do when trying to tell a story like this one.

13. Argo (Dir. Ben Affleck)
Argo is a stunningly made, stunningly thrilling film, and I think it is extremely apt that this film was chosen to represent the best of the 2012 film year. Ben Affleck has a true talent for creating tension, and also creating an atmosphere that's true to the period the film is set in. There's something so perfect about the way this film is made, from the editing to the general look of the film. Plus, it puts actual meaning into being an "edge of your seat thriller". To be honest, I couldn't really care less about the apparent omission of New Zealand's part in this story, on account that this is an extremely good film.

12. Amour (Dir. Michael Haneke)
I'd probably never revisit this film ever again because it left me a bit paralysed with unhappiness, but there's no denying that this is a uniquely devastating piece of cinema. It was hard to view it with an objective eye since I watched it a little too close to my own Grandmother's death, yet I think there's still a little bit of scar tissue from this movie. It is probably one of the more different, yet extremely depressing portrayals of love on screen - is this what the critics wanted when they asked for a better romantic genre? Who knows, but Michael Haneke sure has a knack for making you feel a little beyond sad.

11. Bernie (Dir. Richard Linklater)
I still can't even get over the fact that Bernie is a true story, nor can I get over how perfect Richard Linklater is as a filmmaker. This film treads a very fine line between telling a story through fiction and non-fiction, mixing both elements so well that you can't really tell if what you're seeing is true or just made up. Jack Black's central performance is a triumph, along with great support from Shirley Maclaine and the ever-amazing Matthew McConaughey. Let's just say that this is a minor triumph and Richard Linklater's excellent filmography - one filmography that is probably one of the more diverse and consistently great filmographies out there.

10. End of Watch (Dir. David Ayer)
There was nothing worse than feeling deflated and tired because I'm on a flight back from having the time of my life in Japan, and I decide to watch End of Watch at probably around 1am. I thought it would be an average cop movie. Turns out by the end I was curled up on my seat, feeling disgusting and crying my eyes out because this film was far from an average cop movie. Sure, the 'found footage' aspect was a bit distracting, but the film itself was an excellent character study. There's just so much about this film that works, even when it shouldn't.

9. Brave (Dir. Mark Andrews and Brenda Chapman)
The other day I had a bit of a mental breakdown when I was talking to someone in my class about how much we loved this film. Lesser Pixar? I think not. I think it carries one of the most valuable messages out of all the Pixar films, both with loving your mother and also being your own hero. Can we just take a moment to appreciate what a great role model Merida is? Sure, she makes a mistake, but at least we take the time to watch her learn from that mistake, and be a total badass while she does it. I kinda want to be her. Which is part of the reason I put two cans of red hairspray in my hair and walked down the street on a hot summer's day wearing a heavy velvet dress for the Christmas Parade. Time of my life.

8. 21 Jump Street (Dir. Phil Lord and Chris Miller)
I saw this film more than any other film last year. After the shittiest mcshitfest day of school this year, I watched this to cheer me up. If I'm every feeling slightly down, this movie finds itself in my DVD player. I just think it is the funniest movie to come out in years. Which is why it is, in all of its R-rated silly comedy glory, in my top ten for the year. Ja feel? Ja definitely feel.

7. Looper (Dir. Rian Johnson)
There's something about Looper which is endlessly fascinating to me: it is such a realistic view of the future. It is kind of like an anti-blockbuster. It has all of the blockbuster trimmings, but it presents them in such an indie kind of way, which is so strange. It is inventive and dazzlingly complex, offering far more than one could expect from the trailers. Please, Rian Johnson, keep re-inventing the wheel like you did here.

6. Django Unchained (Dir. Quentin Tarantino)
I remember watching this film for the first time in the cinemas: I was so excited because it was the first Tarantino film I was old enough to see in cinemas, and I had the time of my life. During the baghead scene, I was literally just about rolling around on the floor laughing. During the scene where my beloved Leonardo DiCaprio cuts his hand, I was watching it through my fingers. And while it was a few too many scenes and one Quentin Tarantino trying his best with an Australian accent too long, Django Unchained was just damn entertaining. Plus, Dr. King Schultz is my spirit animal. That is all.

5. Silver Linings Playbook (Dir. David O. Russell)
This is a movie that has grown on me a lot since I first saw it at the beginning of the year. I think my 'meh' reaction to it when I first saw it was a) I was getting annoyed with all of the Jennifer Lawrence buzz (and I'm still not happy about that, but I'm over it) and b) I couldn't wait for the movie to be over because I thought it was a great idea to drink a ginormous cup of Pepsi and...yeah. However, circumstances changed, and literally at any point of my life right now, I could watch this film and it would make me happier. Every time I'm at work, I always stare at the case longingly and think about how much I'd like to see it again, but I've managed to keep it down to three watches. Dear friends: please get me this for my birthday so I can stop staring at it longingly. Its getting to be a bit of a problem.

4. Killer Joe (Dir. William Friedkin)
For a movie that I hold in such high regard, Killer Joe is not a film that I'd ever profusely recommend to anyone. Unless, of course, I was going on about how perfect Matthew McConaughey's acting skills are in this film. This movie is vulgar and nasty, but somehow I managed to love it. I don't know how, but that's how we have it. I haven't mustered up the courage to rewatch it (even though I bought it around four months ago), so maybe I'll save that up for when I'm actually 18 and see if my official maturity makes me any less sensitive to this crazy film.

3. Zero Dark Thirty (Dir. Kathryn Bigelow)
The next three are pretty much all my number ones, but after much deliberation I managed to pry them apart and rank them. Zero Dark Thirty is my first number one for two reasons: a) Kathryn Bigelow is my idol and I want to be her, and b) I am Maya. Which is kind of scary, but I can definitely say there's no movie character I've ever been so connected to, ever. This film is so meticulously put together and plays it straight, to the degree that it almost doesn't even seem like a film. And it is so damn near perfection it kinda hurts. Jessica Chastain is wonderful. Jason Clarke, Mark Strong, Jennifer Ehle, James Gandolfini, Joel Edgerton, Mark Duplass...everyone in that film, they're all wonderful. Again, friends: I need this film for my birthday so I can stop staring at it longingly while I'm at work.

2. The Dark Knight Rises (Dir. Christopher Nolan)
I know, you're all probably freaking out because this is not number one. It is one of my number ones, but just not the top ranked. I don't love it any less than I did when I first saw it on July 19th and bawled my eyes out more than a normal person should be allowed to in a public place. Every time I think about it, I want to cry. No, it is nowhere near as good as The Dark Knight. But I love every minute of those 2 hours and 45 minutes (even though I get extremely annoyed whenever Marion Cotillard turns up). Christopher Nolan is still God. It still has some of the most potent imagery of 2012. 'Why Do We Fall?' and 'Rise' are still my number one let's get hyped/let's get overly emotional songs. I just love this film, despite all the backlash. Oh and by the way, I've already mentally booked my tickets/sanity for when Interstellar comes out next year.

1. The Perks of Being a Wallflower (Dir. Stephen Chbosky)
So this is my number one. Why? It is perfect. When I read the book last year, it kinda changed my life. And then the movie came along and it broke my heart into a million pieces but somehow put it back together again. I really doubt that a movie that is so perfect in its portrayal of teen life will ever come around again, so I'm glad that it happened while I was a teenager (mind you, everyone from the 80's probably thinks that about The Breakfast Club). Future kids: you'll be watching this the day you turn into a teenager. By which point I'll hopefully be married to either Logan Lerman or Ezra Miller. Hopefully.

What do you think of this list? What were your favourite films of 2012?

The Perks of Being Infinitely Awesome.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012) / US / Currently undated in NZ / Written and directed by Stephen Chbosky, adapted from his novel of the same name / Starring Logan Lerman, Emma Watson, Ezra Miller, Mae Whitman, Nina Dobrev, Paul Rudd, Dylan McDermott, Kate Walsh, Johnny Simmons, Melanie Lynskey, Erin Wilhelmi / 102 mins.

Let me tell you something: when I first read Stephen Chbosky's book The Perks of Being a Wallflower last October, it literally changed my life. And there are probably thousands of teenagers out there who can vouch for the novel in the same way I can. The thing about Perks is that it just seems to capture teen life, without alienating the reader. While it doesn't paint those teenage years to be the most wonderful, even in the darkest stages it doesn't make you feel like this is trivialised account of being a teenager from someone who has forgotten what it's like. I'd be damned if I could find a teenager who didn't connect with even the smallest detail of that beautiful book. Considering it is written through the protagonist Charlie's (played here by Logan Lerman) letters, it was always gonna be a hard deal to try and translate those letters to the screen. Luckily, none other than Stephen Chbosky did it. And here we have it: in 2012 (well, 2013 for me), teenagers could be reminded that everything is going to be okay, one way or another. Thank goodness for Stephen Chbosky.

The story follows Charlie, a wallflower: the kind of person who sees everything but doesn't want to participate. He's a 15 year old who is beginning his freshman year at high school, and is slow to make friends - or even approach the idea of making friends. However, two seniors, the openly gay Patrick (Ezra Miller) and his step sister Sam (Emma Watson) take him in and welcome him to 'the island of misfit toys'. While Charlie's wallflower blossoms in the group, as the film goes on we find out more about Charlie and why he is the way he is, which I dare say makes for some of the most devastating stuff I've ever witnessed.

10 Movies that TIFF Got Me Extra Excited For

The Toronto International Film Festival may have ended a week ago, but it's going to stick with me a while. Why? Because I'm super excited to see a whole lot of films, mainly because the reaction they got at TIFF. It is a fairly boring list, but hey, it was nice to know that these movies should be pretty decent. (Plus...in case you're wondering why The Master isn't on here and everyone must be super excited about that movie, TIFF didn't really do anything to amp up my excitement. I've had the same level ever since I knew that Paul Thomas Anderson's name was attached to it)

Frances Ha

Admittedly, I had no idea that this movie existed until TIFF happened. I'm damn glad that TIFF shed some light on it, though. Directed by Noah Baumbach, which reunites him with his Greenberg star Greta Gerwig, who both co-writes and stars in the film, Frances Ha is basically a slice of Frances' life shot in black-and-white. It just looks like one of those simple films with a simple purpose, which is something that gets so overtly dressed up these days. Plus, Greta Gerwig is a pretty funny lass.

Looper

I knew that this one would be good, but I wasn't expecting the amount of rave reviews that I've seen. Rian Johnson's latest, again reuniting him with Joseph Gordon-Levitt (who this time has a few alterations so he looks like a young Bruce Willis), looks like quite the mind-bender. Like, it looks a little Inception like, but with a bit of an indie twist. I don't know, I could be talking complete bullocks, but all I know is that I'm really looking forward to catching this on the big screen in the holidays.