Monday, April 9, 2012

Lame Trailer Clichés: The Textbook Teen Trailer

Sorry for the absence of this feature last week - I had the migraine sent straight from hell. This post is probably going to make that migraine come back. Why? I'm looking at the trailers from two of my least favourite movies of 2011: Abduction and The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1. Their purpose? As we all well know, these were movies with a target audience of my peers (maybe slightly younger though). But they did a good job of warning me to stay away. Each of the trailers come out of the same mould. So if you're ever making a teenager movie, I'll give you the recipe to how you can make a trailer for it...

1. The awkward doting look at the one you love...

2. ...which escalates into sexy time...


4. Damsels in distress!

5. The 'shit has hit the fan' face.

6. Taylor Lautner crying!

7. Taylor Lautner saves the day!

"Whoever these people are, whatever they want, I have to stop them."
"If you kill her then you kill me!"

8. A dramatic falling scene to cap things off.

9. And thanks to Breaking Dawn, a totally unrelated shot of the statue in Rio de Janeiro.

OOOOH, so much drama! The teens dig that. Normal people probably don't. What say you? Anything that annoys you about teen-targeted trailers?


  1. ANYTHING that annoys me about teen trailers? Well, all the bullshit that you've mentioned pisses me off to no end. Why the Rio statue in the Breaking Dawn trailer? Is the film set in Brazil?

    1. That's where Edward and Bella go for their honeymoon, but I'm not sure why they have that clip right when everything's being 'epic'.

  2. Haha, well this is one kind. The other is the really obnoxious narrator in the "oh we're going to get drunk and laid" teen movies. I hate him.

  3. Yikes!!!! Those are bad cliches. Oh, I read that Taylor Lautner is going to be in the sequel to Grown Ups w/ Adam Sandler. Oh boy, it looks like the kid's 15 minutes of fame are about to be up in a few.

    1. Wait...they're making a sequel?! This is why we can't have good things on this Earth.

  4. You made me laugh, thank you, I needed it :) stupid trailer cliches

  5. Robert Pattinson just looks constipated. Constantly constipated.


You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.


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